Cobalt Blue and Ass-Smacked Purple
I am funky-colored today, from my tippy-top to my bim-bam bottom. Well, actually, just in those areas, not in between. I woke up to my new cobalt blue hair (oh my!) and a huge purple bruise on my bum (ouch!) that I obtained by falling down the stairs yesterday. I feel slick. Yeah, baby.
I'm not sure exactly what happened. I was going down the stairs (bamboo steps with no carpeting) with one hand on the railing and the other holding a bowl of baked Tostitos with messy dip. Emphasis on messy. I'm not sure if my knee buckled or I slipped or both, but my legs flew out from under me and all I remember is painfully slamming down the stairs from a prone position, my bottom doing much of the bouncing. Damn that thing for stickin' out so much in the back. Of course, the dip and chips flew everywhere (onto the stairs, my clothes, the wall) and I landed on the bottom, in lots of pain.
Kathy rushed down the stairs, worried. I pulled myself almost up right, glancing about to see crushed chips on all the steps and dip splattered in all directions. All I could do was say I was okay, wave at the mess and say, "I can't clean this up right now" and stumble stooped over through the studio door. I took off my clothes as I walked because, well, the worst thing would be to sit down in dip splattered clothes, right?
I spent a while on the fainting couch (yeah, I have a fainting couch!) on the less-painful hip, feeling very stupid. Now my bottom is keeping my secrets - better than having a bruise in plain site, but not so easy to sit on!
The Girl with Pthalo Blue Hair (Green Shade)
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